12 steps ahead

Thursday, February 17, 2011

2/17/2011 Daily Reflections

THE LOVE IN THEIR EYES
Some of us won't believe in God, others can't, and
still others who do not believe that God exists have
no faith whatever He will perform this miracle.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 25
It was the changes I saw in the new people who came
into the Fellowship that helped me lose my fear, and
change my negative attitude to a positive one. I could
see the love in their eyes and I was impressed by how
much their "One Day at a Time" sobriety meant to them.
They had looked squarely at Step Two and came to believe
that a power greater than themselves was restoring them
to sanity. That gave me faith in the Fellowship, and
hope that it could work for me too. I found that God
was a loving God, not that punishing God I feared before
coming to A.A. I also found that He had been with me
during all those times I had been in trouble before I
came to A.A. I know today that He was the one who led
me to A.A. and that I am a miracle.

from "Daily Reflections"

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Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Product of My Environment - submitted by Ryan R.

Looking back at my life, it is undeniable that to some extent I have been a product of my environment. The main environment that I was involved in included drugs and alcohol. Active in my disease, every friend I had, or situation I chose to involve myself in, was somehow related to drinking and using. One of the reasons why I started drinking and using in the first place was because my peer group was doing it and I wanted to fit in. As I was getting into drinking and using, the people who were not into it seemed to phase out of my life, and I became a magnet for other delinquents like me.

I did the majority of my drinking and using back in San Diego where I am originally from. I hit several bottoms there and I tried dry sobriety a few times. I remember the first time I tried to abstain, I was seventeen. I did it for a little while with my parents trying to control who I spent my time with. But this only frustrated me. It became way too much to resist. After that I always had an alibi in order to hang out with the kids who drank and used.

The next time I tried to abstain, I did it for the sake of doing something with my life. I went to school, worked, had a band, and a girlfriend. I was able to remain clean for almost three years, but I got tired of it. Life was dull, so I wanted to bring some chaos around. I saw my old friends experimenting with hard drugs and I felt I was missing out, so I went out and did my thing. I wanted freedom but this was where the walls really started to cave in on me.

By the end of that run, I was so beaten down that I really did want to try something new, but I was in too deep. I wanted something different, but nothing changed because I was not willing to change my behaviors. These behaviors were all common amongst my friends. In fact, we fed off of each other.

I entered a sober living when I had burned all of my bridges. I began to want to be sober and to take pride in the fact that I was stacking days. I was just unwilling to get away from people who were not sober. The obsession was strengthened by the fact that I was still putting myself in these situations where I was around people who were drinking and drugging. I felt so left out and I wanted relief from the discomfort of having to feel. It become too much.

This time around, I left my old environment. I moved into a recovery house in Los Angeles where I couldn’t contact any of the people that used to co-sign my disease. This meant all the difference for me. There was no one that I could use to rationalize my own problems, by saying, “at least I’m not that bad.” There were no reservations and there were no distractions. I have friends now that actually care about me. I finally found the right environment to work on my recovery and as a result, I have been able to identify why I could not get sober. The bottom line is that I had to distance myself from my old life in order to change my life. Now it is all about sticking with the winners.

-Ryan R.

2/16/2011 Daily Reflections

TAKING ACTION
Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are
being fulfilled among us--sometimes quickly, sometimes
slowly. They will always materialize if we work for
them.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 84
One of the most important things A.A. has given me, in
addition to freedom from booze, is the ability to take
"right action." It says the promises will ALWAYS
materialize if I WORK for them. Fantasizing about them,
debating them, preaching about them and faking them
just won't work. I'll remain a miserable, rationalizing
dry drunk. By taking action and working the Twelve Steps
in all my affairs, I'll have a life beyond my wildest
dreams.
from "Daily Reflections"

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

2/15/2011 Daily Reflections

TAKING ACTION

Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are
being fulfilled among us--sometimes quickly, sometimes
slowly. They will always materialize if we work for
them.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 84

One of the most important things A.A. has given me, in
addition to freedom from booze, is the ability to take
"right action." It says the promises will ALWAYS
materialize if I WORK for them. Fantasizing about them,
debating them, preaching about them and faking them
just won't work. I'll remain a miserable, rationalizing
dry drunk. By taking action and working the Twelve Steps
in all my affairs, I'll have a life beyond my wildest
dreams.
from "Daily Reflections"

Monday, February 14, 2011

2/14/2011 Daily Reflections

EXPECTATIONS vs. DEMANDS
Burn the idea into the consciousness of every man that
he can get well regardless of anyone. The only condition
is that he trust in God and clean house.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 98
Dealing with expectations is a frequent topic at
meetings. It isn't wrong to expect progress of myself,
good things from life, or decent treatment from others.
Where I get into trouble is when my expectations become
demands. I will fall short of what I wish to be and
situations will go in ways I do not like, because
people will let me down sometimes. The only question
is: "What am I going to about it?" Wallow in self-pity
or anger; retaliate and make a bad situation worse; or
will I trust in God's power to bring blessings on the
messes in which I find myself? Will I ask Him what I
should be learning; do I keep on doing the right things
I know how to do, no matter what; do I take the time to
share my faith and blessings with others?

from "Daily Reflections"

Sunday, February 13, 2011

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2/13/2011 Daily Reflections

WE CAN'T THINK OUR WAY SOBER

To the intellectually self-sufficient man or woman,
many A.A.'s can say, "Yes, we were like you--far too
smart for our own good.... Secretly, we felt we could
float above the rest of the folks on our brain power
alone."

AS BILL SEES IT, p. 60

Even the most brilliant mind is no defense against the
disease of alcoholism. I can't think my way sober. I
try to remember that intelligence is a God-given
attribute that I may use, a joy--like having a talent
for dancing or drawing or carpentry. It does not make
me better than anyone else, and it is not a particularly
reliable tool for recovery, for it is a power greater
than myself who will restore me to sanity--not a high
IQ or a college degree.

from "Daily Reflections"